In Gretchen Rubin’s book The Four Tendencies, the author talks about expectations - both internal and external - and why we do or don’t meet them. There’s a 12 question quiz to identify your tendency: Upholder, Obliger, Questioner or Rebel. (If you’re a rebel, like one of my family members, you might refuse to take the quiz, thinking it’s stupid. Hahah. Totally on point!)

The first question on the quiz is about New Year’s resolutions:

#1 Have you kept a New Year’s resolution where you weren’t accountable to anyone—a resolution like drinking more water or keeping a journal?

The questions in themselves are thought-provoking, and your answers shape your tendency. Most of us have a dominate one and some characteristics of a second one. Reading about the four tendencies can be very helpful in understanding not only your own motivation but also that of family members and friends.

According to Gretchen’s website, in summary:

Upholders want to know what should be done.
Questioners want justifications.
Obligers need accountability.
Rebels want freedom to do something their own way.

Which one do you think you are? Try the quiz and then read the book. It may help you keep (or at least understand) those New Year’s resolutions. Best of luck!